Thursday, July 2, 2009

Clean Joke of the Day

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Howdy :), it's me, Joe Cosity here!

An older woman recently returned from her hometown in North
Carolina and told a friend they'd spruced up the churchyard
cemetery since her last visit several years past. "Lots of
new greenery," she said. "And families are together now."

"All together?" her friend asked, puzzled.

"Well," the first replied, "years ago they never much
worried where they buried someone because everyone was a
neighbor anyhow. They'd just dig a grave wherever it seemed
to balance things. But they've redone it so people are with
their children and grandchildren, instead of scattered."

The friend was aghast. "You mean they exhumed all those
people and reburied them?"

"Oh my, no," was the reply. "We just shifted the headstones.
Everyone agrees it looks ever so much nicer."
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The hand of the LORD was upon me, and carried me out in the
spirit of the LORD, and set me down in the midst of the
valley which was full of bones, and caused me to pass by
them round about: and, behold, there were very many in the
open valley; and, lo, they were very dry.

And he said unto me, Son of man, can these bones live? And I
answered, O Lord GOD, thou knowest. Again he said unto me,
Prophesy upon these bones, and say unto them, O ye dry bones,
hear the word of the LORD.

Thus saith the Lord GOD unto these bones; Behold, I will
cause breath to enter into you, and ye shall live: and I
will lay sinews upon you, and will bring up flesh upon you,
and cover you with skin, and put breath in you, and ye shall
live; and ye shall know that I am the LORD.

So I prophesied as I was commanded: and as I prophesied,
there was a noise, and behold a shaking, and the bones came
together, bone to his bone. And when I beheld, lo, the sinews
and the flesh came up upon them, and the skin covered them
above: but there was no breath in them.

Then said he unto me, Prophesy unto the wind, prophesy, son
of man, and say to the wind, Thus saith the Lord GOD; Come
from the four winds, O breath, and breathe upon these slain,
that they may live.

So I prophesied as he commanded me, and the breath came into
them, and they lived, and stood up upon their feet, an
exceeding great army. Then he said unto me, Son of man, these
bones are the whole house of Israel: behold, they say, Our
bones are dried, and our hope is lost: we are cut off for
our parts.

Therefore prophesy and say unto them, Thus saith the Lord
GOD; Behold, O my people, I will open your graves, and cause
you to come up out of your graves, and bring you into the
land of Israel.

And ye shall know that I am the LORD, when I have opened
your graves, O my people, and brought you up out of your
graves, And shall put my spirit in you, and ye shall live,
and I shall place you in your own land: then shall ye know
that I the LORD have spoken it, and performed it, saith the
LORD. -Ezekiel 37:1

I'm glad you could join me for today's content, and I look
forward to bringing you more next time!

Until then, bye-bye!
Joe Cosity

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Clean Joke of the Day exists to proclaim the truth of God, Jesus Christ, through emotional encouragement and spiritual exhortation.

Reminder: Joe Cosity is only a fictitious person, the result of imagination. Therefore, events depicted in this newsletter as real are actually either partially or completely made up to help you laugh. To contact Joe, simply send an email to:
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After a moment's reflection, Johnny said, "Canoe?"



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