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Monday, November 2, 2009
About Web Humor: Funny List: The Top Ten Friendliest Ways to Kill A Man
Clean Joke of the Day
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receive clean, Christ honoring humor simply by visiting
http://www.cleanjokeoftheday.com
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Howdy :), it's me, Joe Cosity here!
Sally was recently widowed, and also a first-grade teacher.
One night she was trying out an art project: making a person
with simple materials. She took a coat hanger, attached a
paper-plate face, put a shirt on the hanger, and stuffed
it. Then she set it on the couch to see how it looked.
Later that evening, her son walked through the door, home
for a surprise visit. Taking one look at the coat-hanger
figure sitting on the couch, he said, "Mom, it's not that
bad, is it?"
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Are you lonely?
O LORD, thou hast searched me, and known me. Thou knowest my
downsitting and mine uprising, thou understandest my thought
afar off.
Thou compassest my path and my lying down, and art
acquainted with all my ways. For there is not a word in my
tongue, but, lo, O LORD, thou knowest it altogether. Thou
hast beset me behind and before, and laid thine hand upon me.
Such knowledge is too wonderful for me; it is high, I cannot
attain unto it. Whither shall I go from thy spirit? or
whither shall I flee from thy presence?
If I ascend up into heaven, thou art there: if I make my bed
in hell, behold, thou art there. If I take the wings of the
morning, and dwell in the uttermost parts of the sea; even
there shall thy hand lead me, and thy right hand shall hold
me.
If I say, Surely the darkness shall cover me; even the night
shall be light about me. Yea, the darkness hideth not from
thee; but the night shineth as the day: the darkness and the
light are both alike to thee.
For thou hast possessed my reins: thou hast covered me in my
mother's womb. I will praise thee; for I am fearfully and
wonderfully made: marvellous are thy works; and that my soul
knoweth right well.
My substance was not hid from thee, when I was made in
secret, and curiously wrought in the lowest parts of the
earth.
Thine eyes did see my substance, yet being unperfect; and in
thy book all my members were written, which in continuance
were fashioned, when as yet there was none of them. How
precious also are thy thoughts unto me, O God! how great is
the sum of them!
If I should count them, they are more in number than the
sand: when I awake, I am still with thee. Surely thou wilt
slay the wicked, O God: depart from me therefore, ye bloody
men.
For they speak against thee wickedly, and thine enemies take
thy name in vain. Do not I hate them, O LORD, that hate
thee? and am not I grieved with those that rise up against
thee?
I hate them with perfect hatred: I count them mine enemies.
Search me, O God, and know my heart: try me, and know my
thoughts: and see if there be any wicked way in me, and lead
me in the way everlasting. -Psalm 139
I'm glad you could join me for today's content, and I look
forward to bringing you more next time!
Until then, bye-bye!
Joe Cosity
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Email: joe@christfocus.com
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Clean Joke of the Day exists to proclaim the truth of God, Jesus Christ, through emotional encouragement and spiritual exhortation.
Reminder: Joe Cosity is only a fictitious person, the result of imagination. Therefore, events depicted in this newsletter as real are actually either partially or completely made up to help you laugh. To contact Joe, simply send an email to:
joe@christfocus.com
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