It can prevent us from truly connecting with others, impede our physical and mental health, and can even impact our self-esteem and sense of self.
Let's take five minutes to see this week in a new light. Holding our emotions close often feels like the safest and easiest way to move through the world. Doing so can backfire, though. Not only does it prevent us from wholly expressing our needs—which can lead to a buildup of frustration and resentment—but it can prevent us from truly connecting with others and even impede our physical and mental health. Bottling up emotions can even impact our self-esteem and sense of self. The reasons we bottle up our emotions can vary, but they all seem to stem from a fear of vulnerability. Out of this fear, we react through self-protective emotional measures." — COLLEEN MULLEN, PSYD, LMFT
In some scenarios we're fully aware we're setting our own emotions and feelings aside. Other times, it's not so obvious because the behavior is chronic and subconscious. Here are a few signs that point to consistent bottling of emotions: - It seems like others don't "get you"
- You feel like your needs are pushed aside
- You develop feelings of resentment toward others
- Your time with others feels unfulfilling
- You don't feel like you're in control of your life or trajectory
Expressing our emotions doesn't always come naturally, especially if we've consistently set our feelings aside over a period of time. It takes practice, but over time you'll strengthen that muscle.
You can start by focusing on positive feelings, which are often easier to communicate. (For example, telling others when you feel grateful for something they've done.) From there, you can graduate to neutral or disappointed feelings and expressions, such as "I feel like you're not hearing me" or "I'm frustrated that I need to bring this topic up again." Ways to Stay Positive This Week Ways to Nurture Your Mind and Body -
This week, take 15 minutes to identify times when you put your own needs aside and opted to not express your feelings. What was the reason you opted to take that route, and how did it pan out? What would have happened if you gently expressed your feelings in that moment? Would the outcome have been different? Would you have felt better? On tomorrow's episode of The Verywell Mind Podcast, I talk with multi-platinum singer Bryan Abrams. As his band, Color Me Badd, rose to fame and sold millions of records, Bryan dealt with some serious private battles—including depression, an eating disorder, and drinking too much. Tune in to hear his story about finding help when you need it. Follow Now: Apple Podcasts / Spotify / Google Podcasts / RSS Share the newsletter with someone you know to make their day a little brighter. We're open to suggestions! If you have any feedback about this newsletter, let us know at feedback@verywell.com. You are receiving this newsletter because you subscribed to the Healthy Mind newsletter. If you wish to unsubscribe, please click here. If someone forwarded you this email, you can subscribe here! A DOTDASH BRAND 28 Liberty Street, 7th Floor, New York, NY, 10005 © 2021 Verywellmind.com - All rights reserved. Privacy Policy |
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