Saturday, December 19, 2009

WeeklyJokes.com #28

Hi :),

Here is this week's joke from WeeklyJokes.com.


Why Ask Why?

Why do you need a driver's license to buy liquor when you can't drink and drive?

Why isn't phonetic spelled the way it sounds?

Why are there interstate highways in Hawaii?

Why are there flotation devices under plane seats instead of parachutes?

Why are cigarettes sold in gas stations when smoking is prohibited there?

Do you need a silencer if you are going to shoot a mime?

Have you ever imagined a world with no hypothetical situations?

How does the guy who drives the snowplow get to work in the mornings?

If 7-11 is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, why are there locks on the doors?

If a cow laughed, would milk come out her nose?

If nothing ever sticks to TEFLON, how do they make TEFLON stick to the pan?

If you tied buttered toast to the back of a cat and dropped it from a height, what would happen?

If you're in a vehicle going the speed of light, what happens when you turn on the headlights?

You know how most packages say "Open here". What is the protocol if the package says, "Open somewhere else"?

Why do they put Braille dots on the keypad of the drive-up ATM?

Why do we drive on parkways and park on driveways?

Why is brassiere singular and panties plural?

Why is it that when you transport something by car, it's called a shipment, but when you transport something by ship, it's called cargo?

You know that little indestructible black box that is used on planes, why can't they make the whole plane out of the same substance?

Why is it that when you're driving and looking for an address, you turn down the volume on the radio?

And now I would like to invite you to claim your instant
free access to the "Ask Don't Tell Marketing
Secrets Guide" by going to
http://www.TheAskMarketingSystem.com

You'll get a 54-page Guide (in PDF format) that gives
you the secrets to ask-based marketing and shows you
how to take the guesswork out of marketing your business.

While you're there, tell us what's the biggest challenge
you have marketing your business.

From Jim Oliver (author and Marketing Coach)
& TheAskMarketingSystem

----------------------------------------

What is your biggest question concerning Golden Retrievers?

http://www.MyGoldenRetrieverSecrets.com

----------------------------------------

You are receiving this weekly email because you signed up for it at http://www.weeklyjokes.com

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
This email is brought to you by:
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Beyond the Fire Light Publishing, Inc.
931 S. Bayonne Drive
Pueblo, CO 81007
USA

Publishers of numerous teleseminars, blogs, and newsletters including:

Take the guesswork out of marketing your business:
http://www.TheAskMarketingSystem.com/blog
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
What's the biggest question you have about vacationing in Hawaii?
http://www.HawaiianVacationSecrets.com
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
What is your biggest question about Golden Retrievers?
http://www.MyGoldenRetrieverSecrets.com
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Are you living your passion? If not, why not?
http://www.LiveYourPassion.com
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
When was the last time you laughed out-loud?
http://www.WeeklyJokes.com

If you no longer wish to receive communication from us:
http://autocontactor.com/app/r.asp?ID=1067824305&ARID=210096&D=189

To update your contact information:
http://autocontactor.com/app/r.asp?c=1&ID=1067824305&D=189

A Joke A Day - Jokes ByEmail

aJokeADay.com - A Joke A Day
 
The Joke of The Day
Entertainment Jokes :: #13299
By Anonymous from USA.

A woman rushes into a hardware store and said, "Can I have a muse trap, please? And will you be quick – I've a bus to catch."

"Sorry, ma'am," said the assistant, "we don't sell 'em that big!"




Forward this joke to your friends >>

 
  * Highly Recommended Book  
 
  Comedy Comes Clean 5 Stars   Comedy Comes Clean
A hilarious collection of wholesome jokes, quotes, and one-linears. Over 140 pages of laugh-out-loud humor on everything from family like to job jokes to sports stories to pet problems. Funny book for the entire family!
 
 
The Tip of The Day from WisdomTips.com
Words of Knowledge :: #1765
By Priscilla Sanchez from Lake Jackson USA.

A Mother's love
A mother is the truest friend we have, when trials, heavy and sudden, fall upon us; when adversity takes the place of prosperity; when friends who rejoice with us in our sunshine, desert us when troubles thicken around us, still will she cling to us, and endeavor by her kind precepts and counsels to dissipate the clouds of darkness, and cause peace to return to our hearts.

- Washington Irving

 
 
aJokeADay.com - www.ajokeaday.com
4179 W Irving Park Rd, Chicago, IL 60641

1995-2008 © All rights reserved.

Unsubscribe from aJokeADay.com sent to jokesbyemail@gmail.com

 
aJokeADay.com

Blog Archive