Saturday, December 31, 2011

A Joke A Day - Jokes ByEmail

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The Joke of The Day
Pickup Jokes :: #3618
By Matt Glover from Grimsby Ont Canada

Man: Excuse me Miss, but were you born in Tennessee?

Woman: No, why?

Man: Because your the only ten-I-see!




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The Tip of The Day from WisdomTips.com
Famous Quote :: #51
By Peter Prestipino from Chicago USA.

QUOTE: Success, Emerson
"To laugh often and much; to win the respect of intelligent people and the affection of children; to earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends; to appreciate beauty, to find the best in others; to leave the world a little better; whether by a healthy child, a garden patch or a redeemed social condition; to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is the meaning of success."

-Ralph Waldo Emerson



 
 
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Friday, December 30, 2011

A Joke A Day - Jokes ByEmail

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The Joke of The Day
Teachers Jokes :: #20457
By Anonymous from USA.

A school teacher injured his back and had to wear a plaster cast around the upper part of his body. It fit under his shirt and was not noticeable at all. On the first day of the term, still with the cast under his shirt, he found himself assigned to the toughest students in school. Walking confidently into the rowdy classroom, he opened the window as wide as possible and then busied himself with desk work. When a strong breeze made his tie flap, he took the desk stapler and stapled the tie to his chest. He had no trouble with discipline that term.


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The Tip of The Day from WisdomTips.com
Sex tips :: #5355
By Anonymous from USA.

Snuggle Up
Even nonsexual contacts like handholding can prompt the release of oxytocin, the so-called love hormone; it ignites sexual arousal, relaxes you, and increases sensitivity to touch.

 
 
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Thursday, December 29, 2011

About Web Humor: Did You Know There's a Holiday on Sunday?

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Did You Know There's a Holiday on Sunday?
It's true! Sunday! There's a holiday! I heard Brian Williams talking about it. I think it's called "Christmas"? Why is there is a silent "t" in it, anyway? Think it... Read more

Everything is Terrible! Eventually.
Were you around and thinking and noticing things in 1994? You know, a person? Remember how 1994 seemed so sharp and up-to-date and everything of the previous two and a... Read more

Low Resolution Theater: Poorly Explained by Its Name
In today's culture, what with its Zooey Deschanels and Plompamoose (that's the plural of Plompamoose) and Wes Anderson, you may feel trapped under a mountain of twee. But in that... Read more

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A Joke A Day - Jokes ByEmail

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The Joke of The Day
Police Jokes :: #441
By Ccay from Paw Paw Michigan USA.

Shut Up and Trouble were walking down a path. Trouble got lost. So, Shut Up went to the police officer. The police officer asked, "What's your name?"

He answered, "Shut Up."

He asked again "What's your name?"

"Shut Up."

The police officer asked, "Are you looking for trouble?!"

"Yeah, I lost him down a path about two miles ago."



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The Tip of The Day from WisdomTips.com
One-Liners :: #627
By SHAHID from RAWALPINDI Pakistan

SUCCESS
Success is having the courage to meet failure without being defeated.

 
 
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Wednesday, December 28, 2011

A Joke A Day - Jokes ByEmail

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The Joke of The Day
Rude Jokes :: #16440
By Taylor from USA.

With high-definition TV everything looks bigger and wider. Kind of like going to your 25th high school reunion


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The Tip of The Day from WisdomTips.com
Fitness :: #832
By A1 World Nutrition from Cincinnati USA.

Eat more to weigh less!
If you want to lose weight permanently, eating several small meals throughout the day to help you with this. Try to eat a small meal consisting of protein, fat, and complex carbohydrate. An example would be; for breakfast 1 hard boiled egg, and an orange, at 10am have a can of tuna on toast, for lunch a Chicken breast and any vegetable, at 2pm have a protein shake, for dinner a chicken breast and vegetable, in the evening have some celery and peanut butter. You get the idea. Avoid sugar, bread, pasta, salt, but not fat.

 
 
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Tuesday, December 27, 2011

A Joke A Day - Jokes ByEmail

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The Joke of The Day
Little Johnny Jokes :: #19561
By Roy from United Kingdom

Little Johnny's kindergarten class was on a field trip to their local police station where they saw pictures tacked to a bulletin board of the 10 most wanted criminals. One of the youngsters pointed to a picture and asked if it really was the photo of a wanted person. 'Yes,' said the policeman. 'The detectives want very badly to capture him.

'Little Johnny asked, 'Why didn't you keep him when you took his picture?'




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The Tip of The Day from WisdomTips.com
Famous Quote :: #1070
By Alicia from Barrington Hills USA.

Famous quote
"Though no one can go back and make a brand new start, anyone can start from now and make a brand new ending."

Carl Bard



 
 
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Monday, December 26, 2011

A Joke A Day - Jokes ByEmail

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The Joke of The Day
Knock-Knock Jokes :: #13340
By Caitlin Reed from Blaine Washington USA.

Knock Knock

Who's there?

Alex

Alex who?

Alexplain later now let me in.



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The Tip of The Day from WisdomTips.com
Famous Quote :: #445
By Natalia Piderit from Montreal Canada

Being wise
"How do you know so much about everything?" was asked of a very wise and intelligent man; and the answer was, "By never being afraid or ashamed to ask questions as to anything of which I was ignorant."

-- John Abbott, 19th century Canadian Prime Minister



 
 
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Sunday, December 25, 2011

A Joke A Day - Jokes ByEmail

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The Joke of The Day
Political Jokes :: #20081
By Biodun Ishola from Ikeja Lagos Nigeria

An Israeli doctor says: "Medicine in my country is so advanced that we can take a kidney out of one man, put it in another, and have him looking for work in 6 weeks." A British doctor says: "That is nothing; we can take a lung out of one person, put it in another, and have him looking for work in 4 weeks." A Canadian doctor says: "In my country, medicine is so advanced that we can take half a heart out of one person, put it in another, and have them both looking for work in 2 weeks." A Nigerian doctor, not to be outdone, says: "You guys are way behind...... We just took a man with NO brain, made him President, and now the whole country is looking for work.


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The Tip of The Day from WisdomTips.com
One-Liners :: #220
By Heather Carter from Doylestown USA.

Enjoy Life
"Enjoy life. There's plenty of time to be dead."

-Anon.

 
 
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