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Quotes Jokes :: #614 By SimpleSentiments.com from Pembroke Pines Florida USA. Notice to Employees (Includes Part Time Workers)  SICKNESS  We will no longer accept your doctors' statements as proof.  We believe if you are able to go to the doctor, you are able to work. LEAVE OF ABSENCE FOR SURGERY  We are no longer allowing this practice. As long as you are employed here, you will need all of whatever you have and should not consider having anything removed. We hired you as you are, and to have anything removed would certainly make you less than we bargained for. Anyone having operations will be FIRED immediately. PREGNANCY  In the event of extreme pregnancy, you will be allowed to go to the first aid room when the pains are FIVE MINUTES apart. If it is false labor, you will have to take an hour's leave without pay.  DEATH  This will be accepted as an excuse, BUT we would like two weeks notice, as we feel it is your duty to teach someone your job prior to . . . or after death.  This new benefit program started yesterday.  The Management  Forward this joke to your friends >>   Words of Knowledge :: #346 By Bonny Danemiller from Toronto Canada Be without To be without some of the things you want is an indispensable part of happiness. - Bertrand Russell     aJokeADay.com - www.ajokeaday.com 999 E Touhy Ave, Des Plaines, IL 60018 1995-2011 © All rights reserved. Unsubscribe from aJokeADay.com sent to jokesbyemail@gmail.com