I had an epiphany yesterday.
I've recently brought on a couple of 1-on-1 students that'll work with me in the trenches and become better copywriters.
I've gotten on so many calls in the past 7 days that it would make your head spin. I am exhausted.
However, I've learned a lot. From myself.
Sometimes, when I talk so much that I start to make no sense, I come full circle and I say something brilliant.
I was coaching somebody through writing cold emails and I realized what I have vs what others don't.
When most people write cold emails, they are incredibly straight and to the point.
They're trying to be professional, they're trying to sound legit, and they're stating an offer that they think the prospect will like.
That's all important, but there's one part that's missing.
As corny as it sounds…
It's missing passion.
When I write cold emails, I'm so confident that I can help someone that it actually makes me emotional that they're leaving money on the table.
If their emails suck, or their website sucks, or if their ads suck…
I want to help. And I know how capable I am of helping.
This comes through in my cold email copy.
And it comes through when I'm writing for a client that I really believe in.
This is an old sales motif.
The best salespeople are the ones who are convinced they have the best product.
You can take that same advice and be MORE passionate when you write copy.
Specifically for cold emails, let's look at a side-by-side.
Cold email 1:
Hey {name}, I noticed your emails are weak. This is costing you money.
I would like to write 3 emails a week to send to your list. If you don't make your money back, you don't have to pay me.
Let's get on a call. Thanks.
Cold Email 2:
Hey {name}, hope you don't mind this cold email.
I've been a copywriter for 4 years, and I came across your website. I found some easy, low-hanging opportunities for you to increase conversions across the board.
- X
- Y
- Z
I nerd out about this stuff. I've gotten some pretty stellar results for other companies similar to yours, and I know for a fact I can help you.
I absolutely love the product, and I love the brand you've built. It would be an honor to help you.
Whenever you're free for a quick chat, I'd love to share some ideas with you. I've got a ton of 'em.
Let me know!
-
You see the difference?
Second one is way more likeable, and gives you a sense of what type of person you'd be working with if you actually bring them on as a copywriter.
It's got more "life" in it.
I think this is something that you can take with you everywhere you go when you're trying to write better emails.
It's worked for me, and it's worked for my students.
This is a short email.
Yours truly,
Alex
Sent from my amazingly fast, insanely useful iPhone!!!!!!!
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